Oh my life, what a week! What a horrendous week! The only ray of sunlight that shone on my mess was that I had a job and I like my job description (most times). At least that’s something to smile about. Right?
I hadn’t felt such emptiness and loneliness in a while as I’ve been on a constant happy-go-happy trip. Apparently when you least expect them, the lonely and wretched ghosts shout ‘SURPRISE IT’S EMPTY PARTY TIME’. How does one get from such highs to such lows? Let me clear something out, this is NOT a pity party, it might sound like it, it might even look like it, it might be called one by some BUT it’s NOT a pity party. I am solely responsible for my misery.(hooray) No, that would be a lie, let’s add my alarm clock and non conducive roads to the causes.
Funny story I have, The other day, I gave one of my ‘I love life speeches’ to my dearest friend. “Life is beautiful, you should embrace it. See, you’re a beautiful and intelligent person with a body to die for and you deserve a whole cake”. If you’re wondering whether I felt hypocritical, well…wonder no more. I did not (Yay me). Although I meant every single word made in that speech, all I really wanted to do was to give her one of my imaginary black scarfs, dark round sunglasses, and listen to the 25 most exquisitely sad songs ever written and performed, rest her head on my laps as I hum to each one of these songs. We would have had the time of our lives..eh?
I was physically exhausted, emotionally drained and HUNGRY all the time! I managed to wake every day and smile with cracked lips all the while wanting to throw the gloves in and just give up…just give in as the end prize’s worthiness had diminished in my sight. Every time I made the fickle decision to give up, a sign appeared and He wouldn’t let me. He kept reminding me through the smallest of things that He never fails, that this too shall pass like every good and bad thing that’s in the past.
So…being the warrior woman I am, I decided to keep fighting, waking and sleeping using that back up energy stored from my happier days. Regardless of the past week’s busy schedule, conflicting emotions and semi “bi-polar” tendencies, I managed to stay at peace. I could feel my heart smiling, chuckling and muttering, “you’re a naughty warrior”. With all the crazy unpleasantries that unfolded in the past week, I am certain that my happy days will come back running Kiprotich speed to me. For now, let’s fake it till we make it. After all, time is just time and it ALWAYS passes…it always passes.